Hi evo team i have been requested to log and so I shall.
To understand me you must understand my story and my love for the life of iron and no, I don't want no sympathy!
P.s ITS A FUCKEN NOVEL
Just for people to know i am a genuine person.
We all make choices we have to live with .
BODY DATA
Age 32
Height 178cm
Weight current 115kg (253 lbs)
Training experience 6 years
Body fat % guesstimated 30%
Currently: Cutting/ Fatloss for the past 3 weeks. Started at 117,3
1kg -1.5kg rate a week for muslce retaining.
Current cycle: Dianabol 40mg per day
Current Calories/Macros 2800. 200 ish protein, 73 fat, 305 carbs
Past bulk cycle : Decca 400mg- 2x 200mg pins a week Dianabol 40mg a day 3500+ calories, forgot macros.
TRAINING: 4 DAYS A WEEK
Chest/ Delts
Back/
Legs
Arms
I respond better to low volume now on gear. Natty high volume.
Planned cycle if approved from swapping dbol to testosterone
Test enanthate 200mg
2 x 100mg pins a week
Will pct be needed? Wouldnt that cause 2 shutdowns? 1 for pct and 1 for starting test.
About me:
Training since 2018 (will post photo and be the one looking like i starved. I basically did
. I've done all the pathetic yoyo dieting, healthy diets, flexible diets as a natural. Cut, bulk, all the wrong ways 

I learned the fucken hard way.
MY STORY
Late 2018 after stupid aggressive cuts I got a natty coach. Learned how to train properly, did a strict healthy diet and serious calculated calorie/macro cut (photos will be attached of lean and pumped) end of 2019 did a show to purposely get as lean as possible and reveal abs for the first time.
Fast forward fell in love with fitness and lifting. Studied Eric helms ebooks (The muscle and strength pyramids) wanted to jump into the industry so i got my certifications. Passion grew so I went on to study nutrition and certified as a sports nutritionist...
After the first comp the mother of my 2 children said it was gym or her (she was sick of me dieting) she tried to kill herself because of it in the hotel bath tub the night of comp (no this is no fucken joke)
Made the choice to give in to her and my kids to see them happy so I chose to lean bulk lift and fucken eat.
Fast foward covid hit and it was at the peak of my graduation and i was in prep again for comp 2 in men's physique . Gyms shut down and i got rocked with depression having to cancel it after all the hard work. I just thought fuck it im gona train and eat for real this time.
So end of 2019 74kg (163 lbs) right up till end of 2023 i gained NATURALLY to 125kg (275 lbs). In this time i was fucken disgusted couldn't walk 9 holes playing golf but I was big and strong. After awhile my relationship deteriorated and i was doomed with depression again.
I tried cutting down so many times but i keep getting smashed by life and kids and work. In the end what i gave up wasnt worth it. Got cheated on etc cause I was sloppy, i feel deeper into depression. I tried ssri antidepressants but i withdrew from it cause i knew it wasnt really me but the affects of competing and not competing and life.
I started researching my symptoms and i had come across... HORMONES. Time to time i started feeling brain fog at work, low energy, mood swings and so i watched more youtube and researched here and got a blood work panel (STILL NATURAL NO GEAR TAKEN YET)
It came back and I knew it. I had low as fuck testosterone levels it come back Abnormal as the dr testing it was a steroid dr.
I had researched probaly from 2021 upwards when i joined here. I also did john jewetts J3U course which was fantastic into the anabolic world.
Now i knew I shouldn't do test if high body fat and it could cause moon face binge watching more plates more dates and reading on evo years ago
A mate helped me stumble across a deca only coach and Dbol only who had tested on thousands and had success. I was too scared to pin my first cycle and get gyno so this is why i chose deca only as my first anabolic.
I have had zero issues with the cycle. But, i did think it was going to fix my low energy levels, brain fog, etc but it has not. It has just turned me into a blob of mass thats tired.
So yes i do want to swap to testosterone, I am happy to wait until i have cut down more if it has to be that way.
No I don't give a fuck about hair loss. Yes I understand I will be shut down and if i stay. On trt it can affect my fertility and possibly permanently. I am fine with this as i have 2 kids both teens 1 13 year old son waiting for his dad to get jacked to start jiujitsu and one 15 year old daughter to protect.
Lifting saved my life. I just want to feel great again. Masculine with aesthetics to follow. I don't aspire to be huge.
Thank you for taking the time to read my log if you have done so.
To understand me you must understand my story and my love for the life of iron and no, I don't want no sympathy!
P.s ITS A FUCKEN NOVEL

Just for people to know i am a genuine person.
We all make choices we have to live with .
BODY DATA
Age 32
Height 178cm
Weight current 115kg (253 lbs)
Training experience 6 years
Body fat % guesstimated 30%
Currently: Cutting/ Fatloss for the past 3 weeks. Started at 117,3
1kg -1.5kg rate a week for muslce retaining.
Current cycle: Dianabol 40mg per day
Current Calories/Macros 2800. 200 ish protein, 73 fat, 305 carbs
Past bulk cycle : Decca 400mg- 2x 200mg pins a week Dianabol 40mg a day 3500+ calories, forgot macros.
TRAINING: 4 DAYS A WEEK
Chest/ Delts
Back/
Legs
Arms
I respond better to low volume now on gear. Natty high volume.
Planned cycle if approved from swapping dbol to testosterone
Test enanthate 200mg
2 x 100mg pins a week
Will pct be needed? Wouldnt that cause 2 shutdowns? 1 for pct and 1 for starting test.
About me:
Training since 2018 (will post photo and be the one looking like i starved. I basically did




MY STORY
Late 2018 after stupid aggressive cuts I got a natty coach. Learned how to train properly, did a strict healthy diet and serious calculated calorie/macro cut (photos will be attached of lean and pumped) end of 2019 did a show to purposely get as lean as possible and reveal abs for the first time.
Fast forward fell in love with fitness and lifting. Studied Eric helms ebooks (The muscle and strength pyramids) wanted to jump into the industry so i got my certifications. Passion grew so I went on to study nutrition and certified as a sports nutritionist...
After the first comp the mother of my 2 children said it was gym or her (she was sick of me dieting) she tried to kill herself because of it in the hotel bath tub the night of comp (no this is no fucken joke)
Made the choice to give in to her and my kids to see them happy so I chose to lean bulk lift and fucken eat.
Fast foward covid hit and it was at the peak of my graduation and i was in prep again for comp 2 in men's physique . Gyms shut down and i got rocked with depression having to cancel it after all the hard work. I just thought fuck it im gona train and eat for real this time.
So end of 2019 74kg (163 lbs) right up till end of 2023 i gained NATURALLY to 125kg (275 lbs). In this time i was fucken disgusted couldn't walk 9 holes playing golf but I was big and strong. After awhile my relationship deteriorated and i was doomed with depression again.
I tried cutting down so many times but i keep getting smashed by life and kids and work. In the end what i gave up wasnt worth it. Got cheated on etc cause I was sloppy, i feel deeper into depression. I tried ssri antidepressants but i withdrew from it cause i knew it wasnt really me but the affects of competing and not competing and life.
I started researching my symptoms and i had come across... HORMONES. Time to time i started feeling brain fog at work, low energy, mood swings and so i watched more youtube and researched here and got a blood work panel (STILL NATURAL NO GEAR TAKEN YET)
It came back and I knew it. I had low as fuck testosterone levels it come back Abnormal as the dr testing it was a steroid dr.
I had researched probaly from 2021 upwards when i joined here. I also did john jewetts J3U course which was fantastic into the anabolic world.
Now i knew I shouldn't do test if high body fat and it could cause moon face binge watching more plates more dates and reading on evo years ago
A mate helped me stumble across a deca only coach and Dbol only who had tested on thousands and had success. I was too scared to pin my first cycle and get gyno so this is why i chose deca only as my first anabolic.
I have had zero issues with the cycle. But, i did think it was going to fix my low energy levels, brain fog, etc but it has not. It has just turned me into a blob of mass thats tired.
So yes i do want to swap to testosterone, I am happy to wait until i have cut down more if it has to be that way.
No I don't give a fuck about hair loss. Yes I understand I will be shut down and if i stay. On trt it can affect my fertility and possibly permanently. I am fine with this as i have 2 kids both teens 1 13 year old son waiting for his dad to get jacked to start jiujitsu and one 15 year old daughter to protect.
Lifting saved my life. I just want to feel great again. Masculine with aesthetics to follow. I don't aspire to be huge.
Thank you for taking the time to read my log if you have done so.