Day 8: Excessive Testosterone
Taxpayer Funded Reverse Saussage-Fest
Yesterday I
went to the needle exchange, out the back this time! It's a labyrinth and there were office loads of people and an atcual warehouse with three people packing picks to mail to pussies and disabled people I guess.
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More pics of the board in
this comment.
I'm going to write a short guide on how to repeat this process in a new community research thread in the NZ section. I met with The Drugs Project, a taxpayer funded community organisation that tests drugs at festivals and now have a permanent office at the back of the needle exchange, and testing oils is simple.
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It's hard with pills because this tiny little hole circled next to the testosterone bottle is where the sample fits and pills are mostly filler so we hit that every time, tried there pills twice each.
I'm wondering if I could try dissolve the whole thing and it be high enough concentration if water soluble or can separate the filler with a cold water extraction or something. I dunno but there's a 3 to 6 week turn around for the next level of testing.
They had cool decorations, I got photos of a bunch of them for the Evo thread. I liked this one:
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I got all three bottles of testosterone enanthate I own tested, but the orals were too hard because of filler and they're being sent to the lab for analysis.
Im very happy to report that all three were found to contain testosterone enanthate, no other compounds, and no heavy metals or contaminates.
That was all 250mg/ml concentration of Test E from the only three NZ vendors I can personally vouch for:
@SWOLENZ,
@SaintSoup the Evo rep for Life Forge, and AUStarLabs NZ branch.
Nice work guys, I'm very thankful that was the outcome. Lifting aside the testosterone therapy is a long term medical thing and I need to have legit sources with real gear. Hopefully in the near future all three of these vendors will have been through the Evo verification process. They all have their own specialisation and for kiwi steriod and peptide users between the three are pretty well covered.
Slightly better sleep last night but woke up early, guess that's better than the middle of the night. My routine is broken and I need to fix it and fix my sleep and ensure I wake up at the same time regardless of sleep.
Some stats from my tracker watch and apps:
Sleep: 7h 11m
Steps: 18,769
Heart rate: 50bpm - 109bpm
Weight: 73.05kg
Protien: 468g
I atcually had somewhere to be and was running late due to zoning out replying to Evo friends but I've now mostly got muscle memory for my daily pins and did it all in a few minutes flat looking at the photo timestamp metadata, and was out the door! after climbing over the seats to get to it first, of course
8:03am, AUStarLabs testosterone enanthate:
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8:04am - steel meets flesh:
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8:04am -
@SWOLENZ orals, Turinabol Day 1
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Got the supplements and shakes down before sunrise:
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And as I had re-upped on eggs I took my blender in my bag with a egg-shake already cracked into it.
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My journey to getting an apprenticeship to re-train with the fire department took an unexpected turn.
There was a landslide knocking out the train line I needed and it was replaced with buses. The place I was going was out of the way and industrial and a half-sized bus came, aka a short bus.
The government didn't trust that I could get dressed by myself and do the interview as normal people might attempt, though probably fair enough given the state of my peers I was soon to learn, so for a few weeks I'm going to learn now to get dressed, and go shopping with government officials.
Okay whatever, I can play this game for a few weeks, probably a good idea becuse I don't atcually have appropriate clothes.
I already cut the sleeves off most of my corporate gimp-suits and wouldn't wear those anyway, need smart casual I think, or like what a fireman's wife might dress him for a court appearance.
But somewhere along the line I think a mix-up happened, and I know better than to question these things, questions get you on lists and before long you get "good morning" texts from the government. No shit. At least the
Reefer Madness style phone calls warning me of the horrors of marijuana I used to get were amusing.
I was late because I had to get my methadone dose on my side of town at 8:30am at the earliest then catch a bus then a train, so no way I was going to make 9am anyway but then the landslide thing happened and the short bus came.
80 minutes late I walk into a room FULL of woman. With one alpha woman at the front loudly delivering a speech. She stops and in silence they all turn and look at me.
I usually would have felt very awkward disturbing a room full of people like this who are now all looking at me but I felt nothing, no emotions at all and confidently just said
hello ladies, sorry I'm late and introduced myself.
I felt them staring at me... but of course I did because everyone was looking at me... but, it felt different. I now know that's because half of them were turned on and looking at me like I'm just a peice of meat.
Which I am and it was atcually awesome, because all of them got attracted to me all by themselves without me having to do anything at all, execpt handling what most of them would have found to be a very awkward situation.
I don't know why the government selected the two of us to become more self empowered woman, or if they sent us to a room full of woman with low self esteem for a reason but I decided I'm going to just do it.
Somehow at the end of this I might get an apprenticeship with the fire department. I don't yet see how but I've got faith in the process
The conductor lady was on fire, like an opening act for a Tony Robbins seminar. She's fat and bubbly and South African, I'm looking forward to playing dress-up with her. She said she's married so we can't play reverse dress-up but there's no shortage of other candidates... as I'll get to soon.
Another guy came 5 minutes later and the everyone turned once again, his eyes locked on me and I moved my chair to indicate he should come over here so we can deal with this together, which he did.
We exchanged some wtf-is-happening type grunts and gestures but he settled in pretty quickly and was looking around the room with interest... a 27 year old unemployed Maori father nof four who also seemed perfectly comfortable with his being male and heterosexual and "thought they were gonna make me write a CV or some shit"
At the break we conspired and decided to roll with this, the alternative probably sucked more and we can let these chicks dress us up and whatever, there was free coffee, fuck it let's try make the most of this. Seemed like we had a plan together.
The government also gave us lunch. I didn't eat it but took a photo:
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I love the 1/20th of a orange... they paid someone to do that...
The next bit was FULL ON. We got our workbooks and started learning about the meaning of self worth and the pitfalls of seeking external validation
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The Muslim girl across from me started crying when informed that she is valuable and worthy just as she is, even though she is not married. As the closest person to her I was releived when the alpha female stepped in, I read the workbook and pretended I wasn't listening.
Alpha female was really skilled at dealing with this atcually, her people skills were next level. Unmarried Muslim girl detailed her feelings on the pressure she feels from parents and culture to get married and no go to school, and how difficult that is in New Zealand where the societal expectations are different than those.
She said she
knows she's more than a potential wife but can't
feel it and has shit her dad says swirilling around in her head. Her Dad must have some imported bloke in mind else he's in for a rude awakening when he finds out about tap and gap.
Next we learnt about RIS or RAS, I forget what I means but it's like the shit in The Secret where if you see stuff all the time you'll something something. It was atcually pretty scientific and interesting and led to our afternoon activity, cutting shit out of magazines that represent our goals and making our own Vision Bosrds.
She said the two men can call them "game plans" if they want. I didn't get why, but they then handed out glue and scissors. Being the government it's safe and non-toxic glue, no sniffing qualities.
But to get us in the mood we were treated to a final motivational speech at volume, this time about
putting your socks on and going to work you sad-sack cunt leaving your victim mentally behind you and becoming successful by your own measure of success, not that of society.
Old mate got into the spirit pretty early into the crowd-engagement portion of the speech and I nearly shat my pants when he yelled "I AM WORTY!" in unison with the woman without warning.
I was breifly paniced thinking
arrrghh don't abandon me now bro! I thought we had a plan!
But I think I've set the scene for the atcual crazy shit I experienced. We got to roam freely while browsing magazines and I took one of the couches and was very shortly joined by one, two, three girls. And one came and sat on the arm of is as there were no spaces left. I swear I was completely sober during all this.
I don't know where to start with this or what's going on, execpt it's probably related to high testosterone and woman have inbuilt testosterone detectors and my now high testosterone levels are triggering them...
I thought this stuff was pretty far-out when
@LevButlerov first told me about it, and given that I was an atcual smack-head I'd forgive you for questioning my judgement when I say woman and strangers have completely changed the way they interact with me and are now always looking at me and approaching me without prompt.
People make eye contact with me first. Strangers want to talk to me, I dunno it's like I was invisible before but not anymore.
I used to make eye contact and smile at people but that's me making the first move, now it's the other way around and when I want to look down and be in my own world with my headphones on they manage to breach it somehow, I can't fly under the radar anymore. It's really crazy and I can't talk to many people about it without sounding like a total space cadet or even like a delusional narcissist.
But this time it's not glances that i could have potentially misunderstood and they were physically touching me at every opportunity. One 21 year old girl in particular was not fucking shy about it. We were at different tables but sitting back to back. She cut out a advert for a product called "space crush" and circled the word "crush" and slipped it into my hand like how you discreetly pass drug dealers cash in handshakes.
She told me my shirt was inside out, which is was. Damn government was right, I can't get dressed properly.
I asked her to cut the tag off for me since we were all armed with scissors. While she was doing that she started gently stroking the back of my neck with her fingers. It's not possible that I misread this. I'm pretty sure nothing like this has ever happened before.
If I wasn't so fucked up I would have got at least a semi if not a raging hard-on, but this is all while the bubbly lady was still delivering her speech which I was distracted from
"...because you're not a victim! THERE ARE NO VICTIMS IN THIS ROOM!"
It was all getting a bit much and I got up and made my sixth coffee. Didn't need to tuck my dick under my belt though coz that's not fully operational I guess. I'm sure any one of these chicks could fix that given a chance but I can't be fucked cleaning up my van at the moment, not that it would be a problem with these girls, they'd be down at the river-bank or probably just right behind the building, but that wouldn't look good on my updated CV.
I have five more examples, but I'm going to wait until next week and see how things progress and probably will have better ones.
I will share the updated CV when it's done as I did not write any of it. The pros they employ did it in the office while we were making our Vision Boards, based on one conversation where she took a lot of notes. This lady impressed me a few times with her "reframing" skills so I'm pretty interested in this. I did not want to do that and would have put it off, but I need it to move forward with the fire department apprenticeship.
So got picked up by the short bus and taken to a course to make me into a more empowered and self confident woman.
Hopefully after spending money on shit like this they'll run out of money fund any new foreign wars.
Now I'm back and the gym and thankful for that. Got my headphones cranking the new Evolutionary.org podcast episode from yesterday about the dodgy supplement industry and looks like it has chapters about Need 2 Build Muscle, the company which makes n2guard.
I've been very interested in n2bm and listened to the older episodes about them and their products and have compared them to all the local options. I'll make a thread comparing them.
I want to support n2bm because they support Evo anyway, but I ran into issues with shipping, same as other Evo guys in Australia and NZ but we are working on it.
@RoySimpson understands our plight down under and has been helping, he's a top bloke.
And the gym lately I've been unfocused but I'm staying concentrated on getting more squats in and more pull ups in.
A couple of nights I've done my lazy routine. That's where I use the three machines that are in a row:
- Nautilus chest press
- Nautilus biceps curl
- Nautilus shoulder press
And go one to the other and do three laps. I find doing that instead of doing three sets on one before moving to the next allows me to have just 30 seconds rest time between and it's full on. I also do dumb bell shrugs with 22kg as the 4th thing, the racks of those are right there too.
This is one of the big advantages to the exclusive R18 gym, wouldn't be able to use three machines like that at the other place.
The lack of structure has had upsides too. I got some great advice from
@Allupfromhere about progressive overload when I accidentally added 10kg extra to the cheat press accidentally but got through the 12 reps. His advice worked great and I'll continue integrating it into other lifts and machines.
Stairmaster warmup
10 minutes
Shoulder Press
27kg x 12 did full rom and slow but still easy
32kg x 12 1 rir, got hard
32kg x 12 to failure
Dumbbell Shrugs
22kg x 12
22kg x 12
22kg x 12
Chest Press
36kg x 12
36kg x 12 1 rir
36kg x 12
Biceps Curl Machine
36kg x 12
36kg x 12
36kg x 12
Nautilus Abdominal Crunch
27kg x 20
27kg x 20