day 6:
Dosing:
6:30am: 7.5mg
11:30am: 7.5mg
3:30pm: 7.5mg
Eating:
7:30am: Protein bread Milk cup:
View attachment 61783
2 scoops of whey.
2 tbsp peanut butter
2 slices white bread
400ml milk.
almost threw up.
~800cal
75g prot
55 carb
30 fat
11:30am: pIZZA time chicken time
View attachment 61784
1x pizza
220g chicken
slapped.
~
1800cal
80g prot
100 carb
100 fat
1:00pm: 2 scoops of whey 400ml milk.
4:30pm: burger time
View attachment 61788
1x burger
1x fries
2x aoli
1x strawberry thickshake
~
2941 cal
88 prot
180 fat
231 carbs
yet to eat dinner and will snack towards beddytime.
Total before dinner:
Cal: 5541
Protein: 303
Fat: 335
Carbs: 361
I would count everything and dial it in but i have just been so hungry the last 3 days and this is roughly how ive been eating. Obviously everything's higher than it needs to be on paper but i dunno like im im hungry im gonna eat so.. maybe i have aids?
Training:
12pm:
deadlifts 120kgx15x3 (gotta go light cause just starting up again due to past spinal injury.)
3x10 chins (but could only get like 6 reps the last 2 sets.
Bench 80kgx12x3 (again my reps drop off real bad with everything, 12 first, then 8 then 7).
rows 60kgx14x3
lying db skulls 15x3
curls same
shrugs
ab rollouts.
lateral raises.
Note: ive always been weaker than i look imo. also my rep ranges have always dropped off significantly after the first set.
5:30
Boxing circuit about an hour. do this like 4x a week unless im noticeably burned out then i skip a day. Im thinking i might have to shorten these sessions as it seems like the BOL has accelerated my metabolism, ive somehow lost weight in the first week despite eating way more.
Comparison Day 1 vs 6 (yeah its no pump vs pump cause it looks cooler) 88kg(left) vs 87.6kg(right):
View attachment 61795
Thoughts:
so when natty, when i get hungry for just a little while i start to feel really dysphoric, and then when i eat, especially a protein shake, i feel all warm and fuzzy, its like my body is way overdoing the endorphin reaction to eating/not eating. the bOL has made this way worse. like if i dont eat every 1.5hrs i get really crappy feeling. at first i thought this was me getting shut down from it, as i felt it a bit yesterday afternoon, and a lot today (after raising the dose from 15-23mg), and i thought id need to up the dose to mitigate it. it might still be that, but part of me thinks its the opposite, where its speeding up my metabolism to the point where i genuinely cant get enough food (until my stomach stretches a bit more) making me feel dysphoric due to being in an inadvertent deficit. ive gone from feeling amazing on a 10-15mg daily dose to feeling a bit shit on 22.5mg dose. so i can test this by dropping the dose back down a bit and seeing if it feels better, or by raising the dose to 30mg to see if its better. but yeah obviously i need more calories even though ive almost doubled them since getting on. its really weird and unexpected. i thought id be like 2kg heavier by now. my muscles are fuller yet ive lost weight.
TLDR: today was the first day on 22.5mg split into 3, 4 hours apart. dilemma is should i go back down to see if i feel better before bumping up? thats what im gonna try tomorrow, going down to 2x7.5mg 6 hours apart. if i feel worse, the next day im going back up to 22.5, and then 30 the day after that with the plan of staying on 30 for the remaining 5 weeks.
do i just need to eat less? wtf is going on lmao. shit just remembered i came off wellbutrin a week ago which suppresses appetite and is an antidepressant... thats obviously a contributing factor. dont know what to do with the BOL dose in that case. might just stick where it is for now.
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